March 18, 2023

HIGH SPY: Texts reveal paranoid InfoWars host wanted mercenary to ‘monitor’ his wife

BROKE LOSER: Alex Jones' bankruptcy filing seeks to protect him from Sandy Hook damages

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Texts from a phone belonging to InfoWars host Alex Jones, which were disclosed this week, give a fascinating look inside the head beneath the tinfoil hat.

The more than 22,000 texts, which were legally obtained by the Southern Poverty Law Center from a lawyer for Jones (who really should’ve kept them under wraps), are from 2019 and 2020 and are full of the expected antisemitic and anti-LGBTQ conspiracy theories along with his unconscionably evil rhetoric regarding the Sandy Hook Elementary School massacre in 2012.

They also reveal that Jones was texting with Proud Boys and Fox News host Tucker “Pinocchio” Carlson, who probably wishes he could be a real Proud Boy someday.

Jones — who’s like a multiple-DUI subhuman with a microphone (he was allegedly drunk all the time, demanding vodka from his personal trainer at one point)  — was already morally bankrupt long before the multiple lawsuits against him from Sandy Hook Elementary families fiscally bankrupted him.

The content of the conversations between Jones and his father, among others, only solidifies his rightful reputation for being one of the worst scumbags to ever be given a public platform.

MUZZLED: Attorneys for rabid conspiracy theorist Alex Jones rest defamation case without presenting defense
Totally normal behavior, nothing out of the ordinary, this is just how we all live now

The tranche of texts is a lot to take in, but even a casual scan reveals Jones is just as paranoid and delusional as you might expect from a conspiracy theorist who thinks the government is tracking us through the COVID vaccines

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But it’s the extreme measures he took to keep an eye on his wife — while also simultaneously cheating on her — that really show some pathologically sick behavior.

The texts regarding his wife and mistress also seem to corroborate with a Rolling Stone story from September 2022 that described Alex Jones hiring Tim Enlow, an ex-Blackwater mercenary, to spy on his second wife, Erika Wulff Jones.

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At the same time, Jones was apparently having an affair with a woman in Austin, TX, identified by the alias “Pat Johnson” in his phone.

In one exchange, Jones asks her to meet up for “a sucky,” and guess what that is (or don’t, if you’re currently eating/ever want to eat again).

“Pat Johnson” was the right kind of crazy for Jones in other ways, often texting him conspiracies from right-wing websites that he would use on InfoWars.

Jones is also the kind of crazy cheater who goes from his side piece straight back to stalking his wife because he thinks she’s cheating — all while claiming to be sad and lonely.

Also, he had some child pornography and loads of other awful shit on his phone.

I don’t know why he’s not in the psych wing of a federal prison right now, but also he’s white, so yes I do.

Twitter heard there was extra Alex Jones Qrazy out there and delivered on the platform’s original promise of providing entertaining free content at the expense of a crazy right-wing nutjob.

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About that child porn: DOJ, why isn’t Alex Jones in prison for that alone

Follow Tara Dublin on Twitter @taradublinrocks.

Editor’s note: This is an opinion column that solely reflects the opinions of the author.

Tara Dublin

Tara Dublin is a woefully unrepresented writer who thinks more people would read her cool rock & roll love story inspired by Dave Grohl than any ghostwritten GOP crapbook, agents & publishers. Follow Tara on Twitter @taradublinrocks

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