Trump’s hometown newspaper just gave him the Christmas present he deserves

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Perhaps no segment of the media knows President Trump better than the tabloid newspapers in his New York City hometown.

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The Daily Survivor

They’ve been covering the blistering pustule of ego that is Donald Trump since he was a mere aspiring pimple of presumption and bravado on the hind-quarters of the New York social scene that he so desperately wanted to accept him into its elitist ranks during the 1970s.

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The rejection of the Queens-born arriviste with hyper-tacky gilded tastes and a drooling necessity for acceptance by the more established socialites from the NY business scene likely helped form the perpetual chip on Trump’s shoulder and his penchant for bull-shitting his way to get what he wants.

With years of experience tracking Trump from his corrupt real estate roots through his mediocre television career to his inexplicable election to the nation’s highest office, The New York Daily News knew just how to portray the president as he forced a government shutdown just days before the Christmas holidays in a petty display of stubborn obsession with the stupidest of his many ill-begotten ideas, the ineffective and exorbitantly expensive border wall.

While many a publication has used the timing of Trump’s petulant fit of pique to compare him to a character out of Dickens, portraying the heartless president as a modern-day Scrooge, The Daily News took a different approach, reaching out to a character created by Dr. Suess to better characterize Trump as the avowed destroyer of Christmas rather than merely a miserly figure who refuses to see the value and meaning of the holiday.

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With a headline proclaiming “How the Trump Stole Christmas!”, the newspaper put a full page illustration of Trump as the Grinch on its front cover today to criticize the president for his selfish and malicious decision to reject a short-term spending bill that would have ensured that Government workers would continue to receive a paycheck during the holidays.

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The Daily News‘ speculation about whether the cause of Trump’s malevolence is that his head is not properly screwed on or that his toes are pinched is rejected by its Twitter captioners in favor of the most likely explanation: a heart as tiny in relation to his body as his hands are.

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The newspaper continued the Christmas-themed bashing of its long-time subject of derision with a subtitle not visible in the photo of the cover included in the tweet preview:

“Shuts down government over wall to put coal in stockings of 800,000 workers.”

Well, that’s certainly one way to help revive the coal industry given that the highly polluting fuel has no real future, judging by the increasing number of shuttered coal-powered electricity generation plants predicted by the Ghost of Christmas Future.

While the cats in the MAGA hats may not realize it, The Daily News‘ portrayal of Trump as the Grinch stealing Christmas is only inaccurate in its color scheme.

Dr. Suess’s Grinch was decidedly green, a color that’s the antithesis of Trump’s environmental policies. The Daily News should have made their illustration true to the president’s typically unnatural orange hue.

Follow Vinnie Longobardo on Twitter.

Vinnie Longobardo

Vinnie Longobardo is a 35-year veteran of the TV, mobile, & internet industries, specializing in start-ups and the international media business. His passions are politics, music, and art.

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