August 16, 2022

A prankster just posted a “help wanted” ad for Trump’s legal team and it’s breaking the internet

Sponsored Links

Trump’s White House isn’t the only place experiencing constant turnover – his legal team has gone through a quite a few facelifts since the Mueller investigation began. Some comedic genius in D.C. saw this opportunity to make a fake ad for the president with viral results.


“Seeking lead attorney for difficult client,”  was posted Tuesday by an anonymous user, who lists their contact information under the name “General John,” referring to chief of staff John Kelly.

“Seeking a lead attorney to represent client involved in an ongoing Federal investigation,” the ad scoffs. “Working knowledge of social media, especially Twitter is a plus, as is a better than average knowledge of the adult film industry and a collection of Playboy magazines from 1985-2010.”

The joke capitalizes on the resignation of John Dowd, a long-time lead attorney for the reality-star turned president, and Joseph diGenova’s decision to pull himself from consideration for his replacement.

If those burns weren’t enough to aggravate the president, subsequent requests made to other high-profile attorneys were turned down, leaving him vulnerable as Mueller closes in.

Trump did tweet on Sunday that “many lawyers and top law firms” want to represent him, but of course he said the same thing of wannabe White House employees the same day Gary Cohn resigned from his position.

Sponsored Links

“Many lawyers and top law firms want to represent me in the Russia case…don’t believe the Fake News narrative that it is hard to find a lawyer who wants to take this on. Fame & fortune will NEVER be turned down by a lawyer, though some are conflicted.”

The full body of the ad really digs at Trump’s narcissism and self-indulgence. On physical appearance, the author writes:

Sponsored Links

Sponsored Links

“Must look the part — Gregory Peck or Tommy Lee Jones type. Prior appearances on Fox News a huge plus. No fatties.”

On the president’s temperament:

“Must be prepared to work with a client who is very forceful and opinionated about his defense and is his own best counsel. Basically your job boils down to keeping him from testifying under oath and hoping the rest comes out in the wash.”

On compensation:

“Client is a hugely wealthy man. Hugely successful. Everyone says it.”

And, finally, on the revolving door of the Trump administration:

“Ask about our other openings on our staff and submit your resume to be considered for potential openings in the near future. Perhaps the very near future. Like, hit refresh on your browser now. Now again.”

Take a look at the screenshot of the article grabbed by HuffPost reporter Igor Bobic and read the whole, glorious ad for yourself.

Salvatore Nicholas

Salvatore is a producer, political writer, comedian and LGBTQ activist (in no particular order). He resides in Los Angeles with his two cats and encyclopedic knowledge of Britney's discography.

Sponsored Links