Saturday Night Live skewered the President’s physical exam in a brutal parody during the opening skit of their broadcast last night.
Opening with Aidy Bryant playing Sarah Huckabee Sanders, who begins by wishing everyone a “happy Women’s March, a million women strong out there to celebrate the President’s first kick ass year in office” before introducing Beck Bennett portraying Navy Rear Adm. Dr. Ronny Jackson, Trump’s physician, who conducted the President’s exam.
In real life, Dr. Jackson gave the President a stellarly clean bill of health that caused many people who have seen photos of Trump in his tennis shorts to chortle loudly at that assessment.
On SNL, Bennett as Dr. Jackson begins by declaring that:
“This is the President’s unbiased, 100 percent accurate health assessment.”
“At the time of examination, the president was 71 years and 7 months young, his resting heart rate was a cool 68 bpm, his weight a very svelte 248 pounds, he has a gorgeous 44-inch coke-bottle waist, and his height, 75 inches with legs that seem to go on forever,” he continued. “It’s my expert medical opinion that the president has a rockin’ bod with an excellent cushion for the pushin’. And if given the chance, I would.”
“He’s healthy enough to be president for another 10 to 20 years, easy.”
The portrait of a fawning physician eager to please his presidential patient is perhaps a bit unfair to Dr. Jackson’s rather clinical report on Trump’s vitals in real life, but the portrayal perfectly aligns with the overly enthusiastic description of the President’s vitality.
Later in the sketch, a reporter played by Kate McKinnon asks the question on everyone’s mind once they heard that the President requested and received a cognitive evaluation as well as a physical exam: “How broke is that brain?”
“We did do a cognitive exam at the president’s request and he passed it with flying colors, almost no hits,” comes the reply from Bennett.
Bryant returns as Huckabee Sanders to summarize the results of the exams: Trump passed them all, including the Tide Pod challenge which he “crushed.”
You can watch the SNL cold open for yourself below.